How does your mind react to Desire?

Desire arises without will, it is a longing or hoping for a person, object or outcome.  

Desire is an instinctive emotion, manifested by a longing for a person, object or outcome. Desire arises passively (think ‘passion’) out of the complex interplay in your mind, body and soul, that part of you that is unique, where your character, cultural experiences or religious beliefs and feelings come together. 

Desire can dominate your thoughts. Generally, it is a state of mind, a familiar feeling but one that your logical mind cannot always understand. Desires such as for food or sex or recognition become more complex as your mind filters, consciously and unconsciously all your experiences and external inputs. 

They say desire blinds you. Certainly, sexual desire, most often equated with the word desire can be a powerful drive to action. Philosophers, psychologists, authors have been tackling, creating stories, modeling and arguing over this subject of desire throughout the history of mankind, from the first recordings on the parchment to the musings on the internet. They say ‘there is no accounting for taste’. You don’t know why you have physical desires for different foods or drinks or sport, or intellectual desires for curiosity or prefer music over reading or economic desire to make money or consume. Factors in the influence of desire are the advertising industry’s suggestions, expectations of others around us, education and life experience. Science has not yet fully explained the mechanisms of different desires. 

Desire activates all thinking processes in your mind 

Scientists have discovered that our reward systems are activated in desire and satisfaction, like the feeling you get when eating nice food, after sex or having done something pleasing. The limbic system, the part of your brain associated with instinctive emotional feeling is activated, driving you to seek out more. However it is your judgmental thinking process in the prefrontal cortex that helps drive how much more you desire. In the case of sexual desire, studies with brain imaging have shown that all the systems in the brain are activated during sex including your area for higher thoughts, not just the limbic system.    

Desire as a biological function overriding your mind: addiction

In the case of addiction, your thoughts and physical urges for desire and satisfaction have become out of balance. Ever seeking that ‘dopamine high’ or the good feeling from satisfying a desire, such alcohol, sex, drugs, gambling, shopping or even the need for power takes control over your thoughts. The brain and body develop tolerance and need more and more input to satisfy desires, to the point where your logical thought process no longer has control and harm is done to yourself and others. 

Desires in your mind drive you to take action

Your thinking mind drives you to take action to meet your  emotional desire. Depending on the object of your desire, this can get complicated particularly in the case of sex or power, which involves reactions of others.  

Desire can be a thought in your mind without action

Sometimes it is your logical mind that will decide not to take action on the desire in your thoughts. You may wish for that extra glass of wine, piece of chocolate cake or gorgeous person. However tempting it may be, it is your thought process that overrides the instinctive emotion of satisfying the desire. It can be argued that your desire for the other thing, for example in the case of chocolate cake, you may desire a certain weight more than the chocolate cake. 

Your mind can trick you into desiring things 

As explained by  Laurie Santos in the ‘Yale Course ‘the science of Wellbeing, our minds do not judge in absolutes.  People adapt and want more or social comparison plays a strong role, a state that scientists have termed  ‘hedonic adaptation’. The advertising industry is adept at exploiting the power of imagination in creating desires, think of food or drink. You think a certain desire needs satisfying but then realise that it does not satisfy you. Numerous studies have revealed this happens particularly with material possessions. There is a threshold at which a new car, a higher salary or house no longer bring joy. Daniel Kahneman, a renowned psychologist conducted a study with Princeton found that above a salary of US$75 000, emotional wellbeing does not rise. High income buys life satisfaction but not happiness or joy.  

Intellectual desire – entirely in your mind 

Unlike other desires, intellectual desire is generated through the pleasure of thinking in your mind alone. Your curiosity drives intellectual desire. The feel good neurotransmitters dopamine and serotonin are activated. Think of the state of ‘flow’, a state in which you are so absolutely absorbed in what you are doing that you do not notice time or the world around you, a term coined by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, considered one of the co-founders of positive psychology. In 1990, he defined it as the ‘…The best moments usually occur if a person’s body or mind is stretched to its limits in a voluntary effort to accomplish something difficult or worthwhile.”

Positive thoughts can increase desire

Much attention has been paid in recent years to the practice of meditation and positive thinking. It has now been proved that positive thinking can change brain cells and boost your mood, motivations and desire.

Instinctive emotions are like the weather, beyond your conscious control. For a balanced life, the first step is to understand human instinctive emotions, how they work and practical steps to take in order to avoid situations that are destructive to emotional wellbeing. Not every instinctive emotion that is acted on has positive consequences. Sometimes, it may be best to take shelter from the storm. Desire is complex, not entirely understood by science. It acts as a strong motivator but can have negative consequences. It is a powerful physical urge that involves your body, mind and your soul.